Stroll Down NFL Boulevard 2008 Week 12

Stroll down the NFL Boulevard week 12 2008

Well look what we have here. We are through week 12 and we are beginning to see things clearer now. The playoff picture as starting to look like one of those three dimensional pictures, kind of hard for some but others see pretty clearly. Okay well with no one off this week then we will just get started… Kick it Expo…

First up we will talk about the NFL Network game on Thursday. The Cincinnati Bungels took a little trip up to Pittsburg to play against the Steelers. Head Coach Marvin Lewis was so excited about being on National TV that after the Bungels scored they ran off the field to watch themselves on television. They went from hotel to Sports bar like a child on Halloween looking for the game. When they understood that they could not find the game because it is only on in the 35% of the country and Pittsburg is in the 65% that doesn’t get the network. They went back to the stadium and found they were behind 20 to 7. So they kicked a field goal and called it a night.
Final Score the Bungels 10 the Steelers 27. Thank God no one had to watch this or could.

Starting at the bottom we find ourselves in St Louis. Well okay let’s get through this as quickly as possible. The Bears of Chicago came to town looking for dinner, and the only thing they wanted was a little sheep. The Bears literally mauled the Ewes for three quarters then went back into hibernation. Even Boo-Boo got a meal before he went to bed. After the game Ewe Head Coach Jim Hasslett had this to say “Baa-ram-ewe Baa-ram-ewe to your Birth Canal be true.” At Least that is the way we heard it.
Final Score Da Bears 27 Da Ewes 3. How many more games does St Louis play?

Up next we head to Cleveland. We know that you have to play every game on your schedule but why did the NFL have to schedule this game? Thank God this game wasn’t seen on TV we don’t even think it was on in the home markets. The only thing that Cleveland beat the Texans on was turnovers Houston had 4 and the Browns had 5. This game was so bad, that both teams left after the third quarter and nobody noticed.
Final Score the Texans 16 the Browns 6. Ready? One, Two Three…. YUCK!!!

Next we will travel to Kansas City for a game between Buffalo and the Chiefs. Again nothing is funny about Kansas City because they are so pathetic that mere words can’t describe how bad they are. WE will not resort to Crayola pictures in this format. We will however discuss Buffalo. You guys scored like you were playing, huh??? Well Kansas City. Good thing you were playing them. Wow you guys scored like good Enema, High, hot and a hell of lot.
Buffalo 54 the Chiefs 31. How much longer can we call them the Chiefs?

WE will now turn our attention to the Patriots and Dolphins. This game had all the makings of a great one until it started. Okay who thought that the Dolphins had a chance to win this game, Raise you hand. You right there in the back, put your hand down, you didn’t think that. You didn’t either. See even Tuna Cakes didn’t think they could win. And if Tuna Cakes didn’t think so then they probably couldn’t. Thank you Tony Sparano for sticking to the run 17 carries for 62 yards, not sure that is what Tuna Cakes is looking for.
Patriots 48 the Dolphins 28. Hey Miami is 8 – 8 in your Future??

Now we will go to Tennessee and all things Titians. The New York Bretts have made their way through the muddy waters of the AFC with their heads held high. So how could we expect anything less than a win against the undefeated Titians? Well we did. This will just further the Heroic stature that is Brett Farve. So let’s take a look at his day 25 of 32 for 224 yards, workman like but nothing to really write home about. But he does get the win even if they ran ball 39 times for 192 yards. With 61 on one carry.
Final Score the Bretts 34 the Titians 13. We guess we don’t have to Remember the Titians this week.

Next we head to the crime riddled town of Baltimore. Well the police should have be called because Donovan McNabb had his dignity stolen. Andy Reid could not have hurt McNabb any more if had pulled his pants down and spanked him at the fifty yard line. Joe “the Delaware Destroyer” Flacco found his way through the Beagle defense on 12 of 26 passing for 183 yards. Wow can you say 3 completions a quarter? That was not bad to the bone, but when Kevin Kolb came in after the half there was no hand jive.
Final Score the Beagles 7 the Ravens 36. Edgar Allen Poe would be proud.

Well now it is time to talk about the Buccan game. Tampa Bay and Jeff Garcia headed north for a game with the Lions. Head Coach Jon Gruden told his players to take it easy on the lions and decided to let them score the first three times in the game. Then the Bucs took over the game. Jeff Garcia tried to tell Jon Gruden just how great he is. “Hey Coach, O is for Awesome.” To which Gruden replied “What the hell” “Well I am on the Offense and we are Awesome”.
Final Score the Bucs 38 the Lions 20. We guess that Q is for Cupid as well…

Next we head to Big D to see if Tony’s Pinky is getting any better. It looks like it is, as the Shake and Bake combination of Romo to T.O. is back on track as Owens caught 7 passes for 213 yards and a touch down. It looks like Tony’s pinky is back in action, and not the kind of action Jessica is looking for, but the kind of action that Jerry Jones is looking for.
Final Score the 49ers 22 the Cowboys 35. Hail to the Cowboys…

Well with the Viqueens game we have to check in and see how well Adrian Peterson did. The Viqueens were able to get out of the cold and in to the Florida to play Jacksonville. But we really aren’t sure if the Jaguars really played this week. But they did have more first downs, more total yards and the same number of punts. And they did have more penalties and more turnovers which lead to their demise. Peterson had 18 carries for 81 yards with a long of 21 making his true stats 17 carries for 59 yards. Still more than 3 yards a carry but far less than hundred yards a game we think?
The Viqueens 30 the Jaguars 12. Viqueens Win Viqueens win. Still doesn’t sound right.

Up next we will head to the Land of milk and honey known as Denver. Have you ever just wondered around the great state of Colorado and taken all the wonders that God has placed there? The Mountains, the Rivers, the snowy peaks, the lack of effort when playing an inferior division rival. Nothing is ever Peaches and Cream when the Raiders come to town but that is what the Bronco’s thought as they played Sunday afternoon. Denver running back Tatum Bell showed why he was the key missing from Denver’s running attack as he gained 14 total yards on 6 carries. Wow what production.
Final Score the Raiders 31 the Bronco’s 10. This was the Crappy game on CBS.

Now we will find out if a Falcon can beat a Panther. In a battle of Animalistic foes in Atlanta, the Falcons showed why they should be taken seriously this season. After Falcon Quarterback Matt Ryan removed his clown nose and shoes he threw 27 passes with such pin point accuracy that 17 of them were caught. He also had no interceptions but no touchdowns either. After the Game he was heard yelling across the field to Panther QB Jake Delhomme, “Hey your no Brett Favre” which Jake responded by saying “Thank God I wouldn’t want to play for the Jets”
Final Score the Panthers 28 the Falcons 45. Is anybody Brett Favre? We mean really?

Now comes the time when we turn our attention the WCNYFG. In this episode we will feature a Star on that team and give you, the reader, some insight to one of the Stars on the team. Let us be the first to introduce you to Madison Hedgecock. This Fullback has helped the Giants to lots of wins this season as a lead blocker for other running backs on the team. He grew up in North Carolina and played his college football at the University of North Carolina making him a Tar Heel, but he keeps his feet clean, so we have been told. Early in his life during a peewee football season he father told his Coach “I am not afraid to go back to jail to get my son more playing time” The Coach put him in a kickoff and kickoff return which seemed to satisfy his father. There was one other thing we found out about Madison, he was once seen in Richmond, we can only assume they meant Virginia. His stats in the game: 2 catches for 10 yards and a touchdown. After the game we were told that Coach Coughlin had a phone message from Madison’s Father, we can only wonder what that was about.
Final Score the WCNYFG 37 the Cardinals 29. We found it all on his Wikipedia page.

And now what you have all been waiting for this week’s crappy game on Fox. The Redskins of Washington traveled all the way across the country to Washington to play against the Shehawks. Matt Hassel beck had a stellar game with 12 completions for 103 yards, a very Ellie Manning day if we do say so. When the Shehawks scored a touchdown to tie the game they just quit. 9 yards in the fourth quarter is terrible. It is like you just gave up. Jim Zorn returned to Seattle and made up for some mistakes that he had their when he was a quarterback. During the post game press conference one reporter asked “When are you left hand” to which Coach Zorn responded “Always, Next question.”
Final Score the Deadskins 20 the Shehawks 17. We guess you can travel across the country and win; if you play in Seattle.

On Sunday Night the Colts went to San Diego to play the Bolts. Norv Turner has hit a bad patch and went into his little black book to find someone he could score with. After getting several no’s and lots of rejection he found that Nate Keeding would kick him a field goal to tie the game. But then a stinking Manning took over and drove 37 yards to kick a winning field goal. What a bunch of crap how could Norv let this happen? Where is the defense? Thanks goodness we went to bed and missed the final minute and a half. Now Norv is on the hot seat like Marty Schottenheimer was a couple of years ago. We can only say one thing. Stay Classy San Diego.
Final Score the Colts 23 the Chargers 20. Even John Madden was mad about it, we think.

Then on Monday night we find that the Saints invited the Packers down for a pre-Mardi-gras party. They put Donald Driver, and Ryan Grant on floats and drove them around the Stadium. They kept throwing Aaron Rogers beads and yelling for him to pull his shirt up. Drew Brees pulled up his shirt, and then pulled down the pants of the Packer Defense, by throwing 4 touchdowns. After the game Packer Head Coach Mike McCarthy was asked about the 3 fumbles that his team had, and he had this to say “Luckily we didn’t lose any, but I remember something that John Heisman said” he picked up a ball and said” Gentlemen it is better to die a small boy, than to fumble this football.” Interesting? We think not.
Final Score The Packers 29 the S-Aints 51. Is New Orleans doing better with or without REG-GIE???

Okay well there you have it, another week in the books and with only 5 more weeks to go before we get to playoff time… We can hardly wait. We are putting on our Fat Pants and getting ready for Thanksgiving and we sure hope that you all have the greatest of time with family and friends during this Holiday season…

And remember like we always say…

Don't live in the past
Don't hold on to something that's changing fast
What we are, is what we are and what we wear
Is vintage clothes, vintage clothes:

We jump up for joy
Who cares if we look like a girl or boy
What we are, is what we are and what we wear
Is vintage clothes, vintage clothes:

A little more, a little tall
Check the rack
What went out, is coming back

Don't live in the past
Don't hold on to something that's changing fast
What we are, is what we are and what we wear
Is vintage clothes, vintage clothes:

A little more, a little tall
Check the rack
What went out, is coming back