Stroll down the NFL Boulevard Week 4 2016

Well it is that time again. Time for your wrap up the past week in the ole NFL. There are a few things to get to, so let’s get started… This week there are a couple of teams off, so let’s get to them, first the Beagles of Philadelphia are off, and the Green Bay Packers are off as well. So If Jimmy is ready, and Gloria is ready, then Expo Kick it!!!

 

                First on Thursday we find the Dolphins heading to Cincinnati. The Bengals watched as Kenny Stills caught one pass for 74 yards, then Miami decided to close up shop. They didn’t do anything, there really wasn’t anything to see in Cincinnati so the Olphins just wondered around the field watching the game, which didn’t turn out to well for them. The Bengals flourished with no defense on the field to the tune of 5 field goals.

Final Score the Olphins 7 the Bengals 22. 5 field goals will beat the Olphins every time...

 

                First up on Sunday we find the one game a year where Jacksonville gets to play in another country. Why the NFL decides to subject London to the Jacksonville Jaguars every year? If the NFL wants to cultivate fans in London, let’s quit sending sucky teams. So we also found out that the Colts can’t play well in London England as well as the United states. Maybe next year the NFL can play a game in China, and send the Colts.

Final Score the Colts 27 the Jaguars 30. If it weren’t for bad luck the Colts would have no luck at all. Maybe Bad Luck isn’t better than no Luck.

 

                Well two teams going in opposite directions showed up in Hotlanta to play a game. The Panthers found out quickly just how bad they are without Cam the Fig Newton in their huddle, Derek Anderson showed why he is not to be considered a backup in the league as he was 17 of 23 for 172 yards. But he threw 2 interceptions one that was returned for a touchdown that sealed the game for the Falldowns.

Final Score the Panthers 33 the Falldowns 48. The NFC Champion is showing just how hard it is to repeat.

 

                Well the next game showed why there is no magic in the world. This was the horrible game on Fox this week as the Lions of Detroit took on the Bears of Chicago. If this was a fight between a bear and a lion, if would have been hard to watch. As it was this game was hard to watch as well. These two teams fight it out for Last place in the division.

Final Score the Lion 14 Da Bears 17. Wonderful, a fight to see who will suck the most…

 

                So the thought was that with Tom Terrific out there would be no way the Pats would start off anything but 0-4. But when Jimmy Garoppolo won the first game, but then got injured fans thought they were doomed. Enter Jacoby Brissett who entered a contest at his local Tim Hortons to join the team for a week. And now he has started 2 games, and finished another one. Next week Tom Terrific will be back, and it looks like his soft balls are just what the Pats need.

Final Score the Buffalo 16 the Pats 0. Yes Jimmy soft balls or not Tom is coming back this week.

 

                Next up we find the Shehawks heading east. Giving the choice of Seattle or New Jersey, we will take Montana… The J E T S Drunken Irishman Ryan Fitzpatrick is still throwing more interceptions and not Touchdowns. This week he threw 3 interception to the other team, while throwing 1 touchdown to his team. Teams should not be able to travel across country and win, unless you are playing the J E T S.

Final Score the Shehawks 27 the J E T S jets jets jets 17. Seriously nothing funny about this game.

 

                Well the big return to our Nation’s Capital happen this week as The Cleveland Brownstains and their new Quarterback RG3 came into town to play the Deadskins. Old RG3 was back in his stomping ground where he made a name for himself… What? He is hurt? He is on injured Reserve? Well no wonder the Brownstains aren’t winning.

Final Score the Brownstains 20   the Deadskins 31. Who is the Quarterback? Cody Kessler, Damn, nevermind…

 

                If there was ever a week for teams in the west to travel east and win, this was the week. Next up the Raiders and their “Can’t do” Attitude came a calling to the Ravens of Baltimore. This time the Raiders followed the Al Davis philosophy and won.

Final Score the Raiders 28 the Ravens 27. The Ravens have beaten 3 teams with 1 win total, so maybe they aren’t as good as their record shows.

 

                Hello and Welcome to the J J Watt Show featuring this week’s guest host Shane Lechler With J J out we will have a few guest hosts to keep the show fresh, This week Texan punter Shane will show us his favorite Halloween treats for parents and puppies. In a crafting segment Shane will show everyone his homemade costumes. And later Shane has a tape delayed exhibition of his punting skills including a training section with some local high school kids.

Final Score the Tenn 20 the Houston 27. Hey Jimmie, have you ever punted a ball? Okay we will see if we can get you on the show to kick with the high school kids…

 

                Up next we find the Bronco’s going to enjoy a little fun in the Sun in the Tampa Florida. And the Last thing you want at the beach is a little low T and that is exactly what happened, Trevor Siemian went down which allowed the Lynch Squad to come in. Rookie Paxton Lynch played well enough to beat Tampa Bay, but just about any junior high Quarterback could beat Tampa bay right now.

Final Score Denver 27 the Bucs 7. Right now Tampa can hardly find their way out of a paper sack wet or dry.

 

                Next game The Ewes at the Cardinals. When Carson Palmer went down, so did the chances of the Cardinals to win. We are still waiting on Los Angeles to score a touchdown at home this season, but since they have only played one game in LA there should be plenty of more opportunities soon

Final Score LA 17 the Cardinals 13. Well Thanks for nothing again Arizona…

 

                Sometimes when the schedule maker plans a game they have no idea how it will turn out. This game showed us that they do. New Orleans Aints went west to the beautiful, Classy city of San Diego. The Super Chargers showed the Aints around town, and took them to the zoo, to the beach, and by the naval base. Then the game started and it was wild. Very rarely does 69 points come into play, but this time it did. So when New Orleans got down by 13 with 8:43 to go in the fourth Quarter, Drew Brees gathered his offense together and told them “We Ain’t going to lose this game today!” Travaris Cadet questioned him by say “Then when are we going to lose this game, cause it seems like we loss every game.”

Final Score the Aints 35 the Chargers 34 sometimes one point can be the difference in Winners or Losers.

 

                So as Dak Prescott hit the campaign trail in California he was  little late to the game. He was asked “did you know what time the game started?” “Yes” he responded “But we are playing the 49ers, and I knew I would only need 3 quarters to beat some guy named Blaine.” Well we guess he was right.

Final Score the Cowgirls 24 the 49ers 17. Jimmy did our hats come in yet? What?? They are on back order?

 

                There are only three things you need to know about the next game. 1. Pittsburg is good when they have incentive, (Like when there is a couple of Junior high girls wearing Big Ben Jersey’s on the front row) 2. Alex Smith doesn’t do well working from behind. 3. This game was on Sunday night so Chris Collingsworth was saying something stupid.

Final Score Chiefs 14 the Steelers 36. When you are down 22 points at the end of the first quarter, then you might have a problem.

 

                And Lastly on Monday night the NEW YORK FOOTBALL GIANTS went to Minnesota to play the Viqueens. After the game Ellie was sitting beside his locker reflecting on the game where he went 25 out of 45 for 261 yards with an interception when his phone started to ring. His mood picked up just a bit has his brother Peyton was on the phone. “Hey Peyton” “Ellie, Sister Girl how did your game go?” “Well we lost, but I didn’t play too bad.” “Dad Just wait I will ask him. Go ahead Ellie say that again.” As Ellie Started Peyton spoke up “Dad, I told you that you do have a child playing in the NFL. Dad... Dad... yes you do. “Hey Ellie, I am going to have to let you go, Dad had to catch the Hockey game so we didn’t get to see your game. Let’s have some Nachos soon.” As the line went silent, Ellie, face turned from happy to sad, and a small tear rolled down his cheek.

Final Score the NEW YORK FOOTBALL GIANTS 10 Viqueens 24. Okay Jimmy, Do the damn cheer… Viqueens win, Viqueens win, Viqueens WIN!!!

 

That will do it for this week

Miss Gloria you have been quite this week would you please update us...

This Week’s Birth Canal Team of the week is the New England Patriots. As we see, nothing gets you something each week.

 

And remember like we always say…

 

You're looking kinda lonely girl
Would you like someone new to talk to
Ah yeah, alright
I'm feeling kinda lonely too
If you don't mind can I sit down here beside you
Ah yeah, alright

If I seem to come on too strong
I hope that you will understand
I say these things 'cause I'd like to know
If you're as lonely as I am
And if you mind

Sharing the night together
Oh yeah, sharing the night together
Oh yeah, sharing the night

We could bring in the morning girl
If you want to go that far
And if tomorrow finds us together
Right here the way we are would you mind

 

Sharing the night together
Oh yeah, sharing the night together
Oh yeah, sharing the night

Would you like to dance with me and hold me
You know I wanna be holding you
Ah, yeah, alright
'Cause I like feeling like I do
And I see in your eyes that you're liking it, I'm liking it too
Ah yeah, alright

Like to get to know you better
Is there a place where we can go
Where we can be alone together
And turn the lights down low
And start...

Sharing the night together
Oh yeah, sharing the night together
Oh yeah, sharing the night together
Sharing the night together
Sharing the night together...