Stroll down the NFL Boulevard
Week 3 2015
Well
here we are in Week three with all its possibilities. This week had a lot of
blowouts in it; we hope that all your picks came in. We also hope that your Fantasies
all came true. Expo, do you have the popcorn ready? Check the list do we have
anything else before we get started? Then can you please Kick it!!!
First
up we find the Deadskins getting out of Washington and heading up to the
Beautiful Jersey shore for a date with the NEW YORK FOOTBALL GIANTS. The Theme of this game was turnovers VS the
choke factor. Just a hint here from us at the stroll if the headline of your
game reads “Giants don’t Blow the Lead again.” then you might have an issue
finishing games. Just saying.
Final Score the Deadskins 21 the NEW YORK FOOTBALL GIANTS
32. After the game Ellie waited for 2 hours for the call from his father, it
never came. When he called his mom answered the phone and said, “Well he said
he was going to watch the game with his buddies, but I guess he meant the
Preseason hockey game because he came home with a Brand new New Jersey Devils
Hat.”
As we
head into Sunday we find a lot of games on the schedule. But not many like this
one. The Oakland Raiders took their 11 game road losing streak to Cleveland to face
Johnny Autograph Football. The only thing is that JAF didn’t play. Luckily for
Cleveland their Starting QB came back to play this game. Hello Josh McCown welcome
to the home turf of Cleveland. Josh took 5 sacks and threw an interception
which was not good. Well we wonder how long it will be before JAF is back on
the field, only time will tell.
Final Score the Raiders 27 The Brownstains 20. Congrats to
the Raiders for winning their first road game since 2013. But it was over
Cleveland. We must take that into consideration.
Well
the Best team in the NFC East appears to be the Atlanta Falldowns. In a game of
Half’s Dallas won the first half and decided to not show up in the second half.
Atlanta has beat up on the Beagles, and the NEW YORK FOOTBALL GIANTS, and now
the Cowgirls. Can anyone stand up to these Bullies?
Final score the Falldowns 32 the Cowgirls 28. You would
think 28 points would be enough to win the game. But we would also think that
if you scored 28 in the first half you could muster some in the second half as
well. We guess Adjustments got the Weeden again.
Gloom despair
and agony on us. Finally the Bad Luck as turned to Good Luck. For their first
win of the season as we find the Colts getting past the Titans. In the meetings
leading up to this game the Colt coaches stressed the importance of keeping the
Super Duck Marcus Mariota in check. Luck spoke up and said well it is about to
be Duck season. Luck was 18 of 30 for 260 two touchdowns and 2 interceptions.
This may have been more like Wabbitt Season.
Final Score the Colts 35 Titans 33. As porky pig would say…
Th Th that’s all folks.
The next
game started late. Once again the people of St Louis protested and started a
fire on the field of the Ewes game. This is so ridiculous. When does a protest
need to include fire and destruction of property? We mean they set the field on
fire. What did the Field ever do to these protesters? What? What was that Expo?
The fire wasn’t a protest? It was Pyro gone horribly wrong? So people weren’t
protesting the fact the Big Ben Roethlisberger was the chaperone of a Jr high
Catholic school dance when he slipped on some punch on the floor and twisted
his knee?
Final Score the Steeler 12 the Ewes 6. Okay Ewes, you are
still the Ewes. Really you can’t set off fireworks in a domed stadium. We
really didn’t think we needed to tell you that. But it looks like we should
have.
So the
Chargers headed to the land of 1000 lakes to play the Viqueens. The Greatest
Running back in the NFL Adrian Peterson was on display and played pretty well 20
carries for 126, he will not get a spanking for that on the Sidelines for sure.
Now old man Rivers needs to find something. He seems to be falling behind to
early and can’t seem to get anything going. He had so little going for him that
he that Kellen Freaking Clemons came in for him.
Final Score the Chargers 14 the Viqueens 31. Okay on three
everyone… 1 2 3 Viqueens win… yahoo…
This is
where we normally throw in a Joke about Tom Brady’s Balls, but this week we
don’t find anything funny about him. If you are in the NFL and you put up 50
points on another team, just know the Football Gods are watching you. And you
will pay the price for it.
Final Score the Jaguars 17 the Pats 51. Yes Tom Terrific
should have been on the sidelines midway through the second quarter, resting
his balls on a silver tray signed by Roger Godell.
Just so
everyone knows, if you get the first 24 points of the game, including a punt
return for a touchdown, and you also get 4 turnovers, you are supposed to win. And
yet the other team nearly came back to tie the game. After the game, Jets
Quarterback was asked what he thought about the game. “Well I threw the ball
around 58 times so my arm is a little tired, and to start the game and get so
far behind so early, and to not complete the comeback like we wanted, it left a
bit of a bad taste in my mouth anyway”.
Final Score the Beagles 24 the NEW YORK FOOTBALL JETS 17.
Hey Fitzie, that bad taste in your mouth might just be your head coach’s foot.
In a game where two teams are going in opposite
directions we find the Carolina Panthers putting their 2-0 record on the line
against the Taints with their 0 – 2 record. So the Taints put the first 10
points then the Voo Doo Magic dried up (unlike their city). After the game Sean
Peyton Head coach for the Taints was asked what he needed to do to get on the
Winning side of the score board. Voo Doo Dolls, that is what we need more Voo
Doo Dolls.
Final Score the Taints 22 the Panthers 27. Voo Doo Dolls?
Really, why don’t you practice a little more and maybe have someone other than
Luke McCown play quarterback…
If you
really want to see the Cat eat the canary you can watch the highlights of this
game. Except that the cat is a Bengal and the canary is actually a Raven. The
Delaware Destroyer continues to be destroyed. The Ravens are playing like team
with no heart, no desire, and no want to which is really sad. This proud
ex-Cleveland franchise seems to be channeling their inner Brown.
Final Score the Bengals 28 the Ravens 24. A late touchdown
sealed the deal for the mad Bomber. But remember while the sunshine’s on you in
September, December is coming.
Hello
and welcome to this week’s J J Watts show. Today we will take an in depth look
at just how you are supposed to keep a “Live Fall Table center piece Live
during the fall and not just an ant pile on your table”. In the Cooking segment
J J will show off his talent for making his famous Corn on the cob with a Spicy
Chipotle Sauce. And then we will have a heart warm segment as J J discusses long
slow walk on the Beaches of the gulf before the game.
Final Score the Tampa bay 9 the Texans 19. As J J Says. This
Corn is great so long as you can get it at about a buck an ear.
This is the week that the Bills finally got
their money’s worth for ole Tyrod T.T Taylor. He went 21 for 29 for 277 and 3
touchdowns in the game. Ryan Tan my hide Tannehill showed why he maybe best
suited for an internship at the French marketing firm “Boi Dui Suk”.
Final score The Bills 41 the dolphins 14. Hey Expo, should
we spell the Miami team mascot with a little d because they only play a little
d?
Next up
we find the REGGIE BUSH has gotten back to the familiar friendly fields of
California. He is now with the San Francisco 49ers. So as all fans of the 49ers
Cheered that they were getting the Greatest running back in the history of the
NFL, The chant grew louder and louder. REGGIE, REGGIE, REGGIE!!! Let’s see what
happened to the Bush this week. Expo do you have the Stats for the REGGIE Bush
this week? Ah yes the third sheet down… one second. Huh this is blank sheet of
paper. What do you mean right? No I am needing the stats on REGGIE Bush from
the game on Sunday. Oh okay.
Final Score the 49er 7 the Cardinals 47. When your line is
blank or you have DNP beside your name in the box score, it is hard to produce.
(DNP = Did not play) Wonderful and usually
7 points wins you a prize but not this week.
Oh no
the trophy this week goes to a team I don’t Care Bears. You know the ones
Suckie Bear, Chokie Bear, Icanttackle Bear, youwnatmetoblock bear, Soft Bear
Idroppasses Bear, Ithrowincompletions Bear. Basically all the important Bears.
This maybe the only time in the history of the world that a bird beats a bear.
Unless we can get Big Bird to use his giant foot to step on Elmo it might be
okay if Elmo is considered a bear.
Final Score Da Bears 0 the Shehawks 26 So congratulations to
Chicago for being the first team in 25 years to have all their possession end
in a Punt. What thrill this game must have been to watch.
So
Sunday night what do we find? We find the Bronco’s and Lions in a Fight for a
little land in Detroit. We aren’t real sure why anyone would want this land.
There doesn’t seem to be any wild life on it. There doesn’t seem to be any
vegetation on it. But Peyton Manning did what he does best. Throw touchdowns
and win games. And there isn’t much else for him to do until playoff time.
Final Score the Bronco’s 24 the Lions 12. After the game in
the Bronco locker room a tune starts from a cell phone it is the “Saints go
marching in” Peyton looks at his phone and starts to shake his head, I have got
to change this ringtone…
So the
only thing left is to fight through is the last game on the schedule. The
Monday night game a rematch of sorts as the Green Bay Packers played the Kansas
City Chief’s. While this game didn’t
have the significance of the first time these two played, the result was pretty
much the same.
Final core the Chiefs 28 the Packers 38. It seems that when
the Chiefs score more points than their opponents they win. when they don’t
they lose.
Well that will do it again for us this week. We hope you
enjoyed it.
And remember like we always say…
Leapin and hoppin' on a moonshadow, moonshadow, moonshadow
And if I ever lose my hands, lose my plough, lose my land,
Oh if I ever lose my hands, Oh if.... I won't have to work no more.
And if I ever lose my eyes, if my colours all run dry,
Yes if I ever lose my eyes, Oh if.... I won't have to cry no more.
Oh I'm bein' followed by a moonshadow, moonshadow, moonshadow
Leapin' and hoppin' on a moonshadow, moonshadow, moonshadow
And if I ever lose my legs, I won't moan, and I won't beg,
Yes if I ever lose my legs, Oh if.... I won't have to walk no more.
And if I ever lose my mouth, all my teeth, north and south,
Yes if I ever lose my mouth, Oh if.... I won't have to talk...
Did it take long to find me? I asked the faithful light.
Did it take long to find me? And are you gonna stay tonight?
Oh I'm bein' followed by a moonshadow, moonshadow, moonshadow
Leapin' and hoppin' on a moonshadow, moonshadow, moonshadow
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