Stroll donw the NFL Boulevard Week 5

Stroll own the NFL Boulevard

Week 5

 

                Well my goodness, we have another week that has sneak up on us, Week 5 and what a dozy. Okay but to be fair, we missed a couple of things last week, and I am sure everyone knew it. And never fear someone was reprimanded for it.   So this week before we get started, let’s talk about who is not playing this week, the Viqueens will not lose this weeks as well as the Pittsburg Squealers, there will be no Buccan game this week, and there will be no Protest for a name change this week and the Feather not dot Native Americans they are shutdown like the Government.  Now that we have that out of the way this week, Lefty can you start us please.

 

                So here we are on this Thursday night Failure. If the NFL wants to gain a little interest in this game, how about they put a game that someone wants to watch? This week’s offering, The Buffalo Bills traveled south to Cleveland to play the game, at least it was only a 4 hour Ride by bus or 6 by Boat, or if they wanted to take a plane then it would be 9 hours, with a stopover in either Baltimore or Detroit, and no one wants to be in either place. So let’s see, Hoyer played and got hurt so the Brownstains had a choice of a life sized Chicken on the field, or Brandon Weedon. They chose Weedon. The Bills didn’t have their lucky helmets on so we think you know what happened.

Finals Score the Bills 24 the Brownstains 37. That is right the Brownstains won. Who would have believed that they would win 3 games this year?

 

                  First up on Sunday we find that the only reason to call the Ewes the Rams is that they are playing the Jaguars. And why do we mention this?

Final score the Jaguars 20 the Rams 34. In the second biggest who cares game of the NFL this week. Why are we evening talking about it?

 

                So the Chiefs come out on the field and The Titans began to realize that they are over matched. How is anyone going to beat the Chiefs this season? We think they are the odds on favorite to win the Superbowl. Well if not them we will just pick them to win this week. After the game someone asked Any Reid what he thought of the Titans Running back Chris Johnson, to which he replied “Hey, Hey, Hey, did you see that play?”

Final score the Chiefs 26 the Titans 17. Yes Coach we saw it. And your defense watched it as well.

 

                Good Lord, we think we see why Archie doesn’t care about this son. Elisha is not playing well. That is being nice which is difficult for us. So if the Elisha throws and interception every 17 passes and throws the ball 52 times how many interceptions will he throw? Anyone? Is that math too hard?

Final score the Beagles 36 the NEW YORK FOOTBALL GIANTS 21. And the answer is 3 for those of you who were about to pull out your calculator.

 

                When this game came up on the Scroll across the bottom of the TV we thought to ourselves great the Ravens are going to kick the Dolphins ass again. But folks these are not you mothers Dolphins, they don’t have that little ball on their helmet, and the colors have changed, would Don Shula or Jim Kick approve of this? We know one thing, these Uniforms are not Larry Csonka approved.

Final score the Raven 26 the Dolphins 23. Are they trying to give everyone a seizure? We don’t think that we knew that the “C” was silent in Csonka till we tried to spell it.

 

                All Indianapolis needs is a little luck. Because a little Luck goes a long way here in the NFL. The Shehawks needed a little luck, but they didn’t get it, they got a little Russell. A little Russell Wilson if you know what we mean, he combined for over 300 yards but 2 fumbles are not good.  And just a note to the Shehakws a little scoring in the fourth quarter would be nice.

Final Score the Shehawks 28 the Colts 34. Luck is what happens when desire meets determination.

 

                Oh here we go! A tough NFC North division Battle. The Lions of Detroit went to the Packers of Green Bay, and would you just look at what happened? MR. REGGIE Bush had the following stats: he had 13 carries for 44 yards, and caught 4 more passes for another 25 yards. 69 yards seems fitting for him huh? And the old adage holds true.

Final Score the Lions 9 the Packers 22. When the Lions score more than their opponents they usually win. When they don’t they usually lose.

 

                This is just wrong wrong dirty and wrong. There is no way that the Bungels could stay on the same field as the Patriots. Even if the heavens opened up and God himself pointed at the Bungels and said you are the winner, we would not have believed it. But watching the end of the game that is what happened. The heavens opened up and God rained so hard that Tom terrific could not throw the ball, and then when Adam Pac-man Jones intercepted old Tommy boy then the sun came out and the rain stopped

Final Score the Patriots 6 the Bungels 13. So this week we will slide our hands under the hoodie and find soft patch of fur on this week’s Birth Canal Team of the Week, the Patriots.

 

                Hey Boo Boo we think you have a problem. Da Bears thought that they could just throw a touchdown pass to Brandon Marshall and get the 2 point conversion in the last 2 minutes of a game and walk off the field with another win. But the Aints have the power of Sean Peyton behind them. And that might be enough to bring life back to New Orleans.

Final Score the Aints 26 Da Bears 18. What is worse than a New Orleans Saints Fans cheering his team on to Victory? Finger nails on a chalk Board? We will hold the chalk board, thanks you very much.

 

                What can we say about the next game?

Final Score the Panthers 6 the Cardinals 22. We think we have said too much already.

 

                What happens when Matt Schaub throws the ball that is caught, it is usually ran in for a touchdown. Too bad that in the last four games he has thrown one to the other team. And that my friends, is what we call “BAD” in the NFL Business. And what is worse is that some guy named T J Yates is set to back up Schaub. His parent couldn’t even give him a name, they just gave him initials.

Final Score the Texans 3 the 49ers 34. This was a candidate for BCTOW, but we think there will be more chances the Texans.

 

                Okay so now the game of the season, the game of the century. The game to beat all other games until the next games comes along.   We watched this game waiting on the Tony “Ohno” to throw an interception. He did, and we were not surprised. Can we please stop talking about how great he was in the game? The Broncos were missing 5 defensive starters. We aren’t making excuses but no matter how you shine up this turd, it is still a turd. Jason Garret the Dallas Football Cowgirls head coach was asked about his feeling on the Peyton Manning interception. “Peyton Manning has never learned from a mistake, because he has never made a mistake. Mistakes are afraid of Peyton Manning.  He once broke a mirror and got 7 years of good luck.”

Final Score the Bronco’s 51 the Cowgirls 48. Honestly 48 points should be enough to win a game in the NFL. But if it is not, then there is more wrong than a Quarterback who throws an interception in the fourth quarter, of a tied game, at his own 13.

 

                The last game of Sunday we find that the NFL allowed the game to be moved for Baseball. And where did they move it? Not to a different venue, not to a different day. But to a time when no one would watch 1030 EST.

Final Score the Chargers 17 the Raiders 27. Just Suck Baby.

 

                And Finally on Monday we watched the Demise of the Atlanta Falldowns. The Only thing that could make this worse would be a Braves fans. Oh wait if you live in Atlanta then you might just be. Gosh we guess that you are just about ready to quit watching pro sports aren’t you?  We guess that maybe you can hang your hat on the Thrashers, or the Hawks.

Final Score the J E T S 30 the Falldowns 28. Right Hockey in Atlanta, now that is the hard to get ticket in Georgia.

 

Well that will about do it for us. And usually we keep the ending short. But this week we are feeling rather melancholy. It could be the changes in the weather, it could be our mood. It could be that we just miss our friend.  So long buddy. We do miss you. Thanks for the memories.

 

And remember like we always say…

 

 

So,
So you think you can tell
Heaven from Hell?
Blue skies from pain?

Can you tell a green field
From a cold steel rail?
A smile from a veil?
Do you think you can tell?

Did they get you to trade
Your heroes for ghosts?

Hot ashes for trees?
Hot air for a cool breeze?

Cold comfort for change?
Did you exchange
A walk on part in the war
For a lead role in a cage?

How I wish
How I wish you were here
We're just two lost souls swimming in a fish bowl
Year after year

Running over the same old ground
What have we found?
The same old fears
Wish you were here