Stroll down the NFL Boulevard Week 4 2010

Stroll down the NFL Boulevard 2010
Week 4

Well here we are again the end of another week. Before we get started we have a few things to tidy up first. Let’s talk about what teams didn’t play, the Cowgirls, the Viqueens, the Chiefs, and no Buccan game this week. Now what that did leave us is a few games to discuss, so let’s get to it!!!! Expo Kick it.

First up we will start at the bottom in the only game in the state of Missouri, the SheHawks came a calling and they had no answer for Slingin Sammy Bradford. The Ewes have had a remarkable turn of fortune and have won 2 games in a row for the first since the economy was good, you know way back in 2008. After the game SheHawk Head Coach Pete Carroll was asked how he thought his team was playing “Well we win one then lose one then win one, then lose one. I guess we will win our bye week, and that is good. Hey when do we play Arizona St, they are always good for a win?”
Final Score the SheHawks 3 the Ewes 20. Would someone tell Coach Carroll that he is in the NFL again…
Now we get to the absolute black hole of the Bottom, New Jersey. Don’t you just hate when you are expecting one thing and you get another, like when someone runs the ole 23 skidoo on you? Before the game Ellie was heard yelling at Da Bears, “We are going to beat you like you some little brother, that everyone thinks is going to be good, but really is just a shell of their big brother, and his famous dad.” Way to go, that will really get them scared of you… But it took a G-aint defensive game to put Da bears back in their place, as they sacked quarterback Jay Cutler 9 times and gave him a concussion. At half time a sobbing Jay Cutler was heard saying “Look they are treating me like Cindy Bear out there.” Then he said “They have sacked me so many times I just can’t take it anymore. I have a complaint. Why can’t we just be birth canal team of the team this week?”
Final Score Da Bears 3 the G-Aints 17. There there Jay you are Birth Canal team of the week, now pull your skirt up…

Next up a game with teams going in 2 different Directions… The Ari-Freaking-Zona Cardinals have done everything they can do to get past the loss of Kurt Warner. However Handpicked Matt Leinart is in Houston of all places and now cast of from the Cleveland Brown Stains Derek Anderson is running the show. It is not the greatest Show on Earth. Come people these are the Cardinals we are talking about it. Norv Turner fixed his kickoff team thank God; he had enough time to practice it this week. One more thing. Kicking a field goal to get your team to a 31 point deficit is like a death row inmate asking for a doggie bag after his last meal.
Final Score the Cardinals 10 the Chargers 41. Not much else to say about this one…

Up next we will head to Atlanta and a little know fact in the NFL. Teams really need to score in every quarter. And if they don’t they may just get beat. Such was the case this weekend as the 49ers travel across country. They roared out to a 14 to 0 lead in the first quarter then watched as the Falldowns methodically rolled up and down the field to the victory. What do you call Punt, Punt, Interception, Interception, Punt, Punt, and Punt?
Final Score the 49ers 14 the Falldowns 16. That is what we call a poor 3 quarters of football…

Now we head to Buffalo and find that the Saber’s were playing the Flyers. Buffalo had a great game as they scored 9 goals. What? Yes Buffalo is the game we are talking about. What do you mean they played the Jets? I show here that they played Flyers, yea and they even scored 9 points and held the Flyers to 3. Well, no, the Flyers don’t play football, but isn’t hockey considered hockey in Canada? It’s not??? But this Buffalo Team won. The other game on Sunday??? Well J E T S played a good game…
Final Score the J E T S 38 the Bills/Sabers 14. Hey the Bills scored to get the game to only 21 points behind.

Up next we will head to the still hurricane ravaged City of New Orleans. How long do we have to hear about the Katrina hurricane that blew into New Orleans like the big bad wolf, when it blew everyone’s house down? At the stadium before the game there was one person carrying a picket sign. A reporter asked him why he was picketing the World Champion New Orleans Saints. He replied “Saints Owner Tom Benson Hates White people…” When the Reporter queried has to why he had this opinion. He replied “well maybe he just hates me because he hired some old Guy to kick field goals this week.” Well John Carney rolled his wheel chair out on to the field and kicked a 25 yard field goal to win the Game…
Final Score the Panthers 14 the Saints 16. Poor Garret Hartley… He has not gotten his FEMA check yet…

Now we will look to find Big Ben Roethlisberger celebrating his final game suspension by judging the Cheerleader competition for the Pittsburgh High School Area. While he got several phone numbers the rest of Pittsburgh was watching the Delaware destroyer Joe Flacco. He was taking the Ravens down the field in the fourth quarter for the game winning touchdown… Flacco was overheard saying at the end of the game “Hey since Big Ben is trying to get the autographs from those kids on Glee we could win this game”
Final Score the Ravens 17 Steelers 14. When will that show be over? All those kids singing and no one gets to vote them off the show…
Next TIM TEBOW went to Tennessee to play a game with all his Denver Bronco Teammates. During the game Bronco backup guard Eric Olsen was heard telling backup tackle Chris Clark “Man did you see TIM TEBOW eating a Chick-Fil-A on Sunday of all days.” Clark Replied “I sure did, and I heard that people with amnesia still remember TIM TEBOW.” During the Laughter TIM TEBOW came to the guys and said”Look TIM TEBOW can dribble a football and I will dunk on your Pumpkin head if you guys don’t shut up.” So let’s look at TIM TEBOW stats this week…. Well he didn’t get in the game, we guess that is why the Bronco’s won.
Final Score the Bronco’s 26 the Titans 20 TIM TEBOW 0. Nothing from nothing leaves nothing right?

Well Well Well the Cleveland Brown Stains have found the formula for winning. First you trade away and release your franchise quarterbacks, hire Mike Holmgren as a general Manager and then leave Eric Mangenius as the head coach to take the fall when the season is over. They finally won a game this week has they had all the vim and vigor a group of men fighting for something. And that something was Ohio. This my friends is the battle of Ohio. A rich and fertile piece of land nestled just west of Pennsylvania and West Virginia, South of Michigan, North of Kentucky, and East of Indiana. But is this Ground really worth Fighting for. We mean it has Akron and Dayton. But Canton is kind of cool…
Final Score the Bunguls 20 the Brown Stains 23. Even with T.O. getting over 200 yards couldn’t get a win for the Bunguls.

Welcome to this week’s edition of the Mister Rogers Neighborhood. The Packers are lucky to get out alive. What the hell was that??? These are the Lions you are playing winner of exactly 2 games in the last 2 years plus. How the hell does a team that thinks it is going to be a playoff team have a half like this???? Interception, Punt, Interception, and end of half is not a way to have a half. Unless you are like the Raiders. Well you did score 21points in the first half and that makes Mr. McFeely happy. And if Mr. McFeely is happy then we are happy we guess…
Final Score the Lions 26 the Packers 28. So let us get this straight… Someone named Mr. McFeely is not the quarterback for the Pittsburgh Steelers right?

Now we will head to Jacksonville to find the Jags inviting the Colts to town. Indy showed up and thought that they had an easy game, but this was anything but easy. Peyton Manning was heard telling Head Coach Jim Caldwell with 46 seconds left in the game: “Well coach I think that just about does it. Get me the ball first in Overtime and we should win.” Then 46 later the Jags ran Josh Scobee out on the field. After kicking the game winning Field Goal from 59 yards out the kicker was heard saying “Hey you aren’t playing Garrett Hartley here in Jacksonville. You are facing Josh Scobee and I am kicking your ass 59 yards to win the game Ha!!!”
Final Score the Colts 28 the Jags 31. That is pretty bold talk for Kicker… We are just saying…

Up Next we will head to Oakland and find the Raiders. Oakland invited the Texans for a rough and tumble game. Matt Schaub was heard asking head coach Gary Kubiak “Hey how long have the Raiders had that emblem on the side of their helmets?” to which Kubiak relied “I guess forever, or 1950 when they started playing why?” Schaub shook while saying; “I thought that was Al Davis when he was a kid. But in 1060 Davis would have been what about 60? When he was a kid there were real pirates we guess.” Back to the game, Hey where are all those Raider Lovers? Yea the ones that thought the Raiders were going to contend? Well if you figure you need to get to at the very least 9 wins to make the playoffs, then the Raiders only have to win 8 of the next 12. We will be watching that for them.
Final Score the Texans 31 the Raiders 24. We wonder who poked that Raiders Emblem in the eye that caused them to have to have an eye patch?

And now for the game that everyone in Football was waiting on. Donavan McNabb got to go back to Philadelphia for the first time. It was quite a day for little Donnie-do as he was 8 of 19 for 125 yards. Is that all? High School quarterbacks have better days than that and they might score at the dance after the game (check with Ben Roethlisberger on that one) but he did have a touchdown and ran for 39 yards with his feet. Isn’t that weird? When the experts say that he used his legs or used his feet to make a play, does that mean he crawled around on nubs going to and from the huddle? Doesn’t he use his legs and feet all the time? But we digress. The Dog Killer got hit so hard that his ribs got hurt and he couldn’t come back to the game. Isn’t funny that Last March the Beagles had the riches of 3 quarterbacks and now it doesn’t look like they have one.
Final Score the Deadskins 17 the Beagles 12. We think we all could have waited for that.

And Lastly on Monday Night, we found out several things. 1. The Dolphins are hurting without Tuna Cakes. 2. The Patriots are maybe the second best team in the AFC East. 3 And Bill Bella-cheat thinks that the Randy Moss experiment is over. After three years + and a 40 and 12 record the Patriots thought that they could do better without him. After all the experts said on Draft day that you can mark the Patriots up for the next 4 super bowls at least and that didn’t happen the greatest coach in the NFL has to trade the Great Randy Moss. And what did he get for the greatest wide receiver in the game? A 3rd round draft pick. Coach Sparano called Norv Turner to find out what to do on the Special Teams.
Final Score the Patriots 41 the Dolphins 14. Hey Guys Just because they are special doesn’t mean that they have to be retarded…
Well that is it again for this week. We have been hearing about the how bad the games have been. And Parity is not a great thing but any day with football is a great day. Thanks again your all your support.
And remember like we always say….

Two gunslingers walked out in the street and one said
"I don't wanna fight no more."
And the other gunslinger thought about it and said,
"Yeh, what are we fighting for?"

I'm takin' control of my life, I'm takin' control of my life
I'm takin' control of my life right now, oh yeah

Well the crowd that assembled for the gun fight
Were let down, everyone hissed and booed
And a stranger told his Mrs., "That's the last one of those gunfights
You're ever gonna drag me to."

I'm takin' control of my life, I'm takin' control of my life
I'm takin' control of my life right now, oh yeah

Well the two gunslingers went ridin' out of town and
Were never heard from no more
And there ain't been a gunfight for a long time
Maybe never, but nobody knows for sure

I'm takin' control of my life, I'm takin' control of my life
I'm takin' control of my life right now, oh yeah