Stroll Down NFL Boulevard 2008 Week 2

Stroll down the NFL Boulevard 2008 Week 2


Well here we are the end of the week 2. How do we get into the games this week? Huh, well we guess we will just start, okay? Expo? Are you ready? Expo? Expo? Where are you? What? I thought you were ready to go? No we don’t have an open? No we don’t. Do you remember an open? We don’t either. Just start the music.

Well let’s start at the bottom and this year the bottom seems to be in Missouri, or Misery as we like to call it. The Raiders came to Kansas City with several things in mind. A team looking for a win, a coach in a fight for his job, and an owner looking for his pants and/or walker well so far Kansas City has scored 18 points in 2 games, that is the easy math of 9 points a game, while giving up 40 points. Okay so you now see why this game was at the bottom. After 60 minutes of time the Chiefs had their coach Herm Lance-a lot Link Edwards head into the Teepee to check on a few things. The most important one being whether he has an outty or an Inny, just underneath his belly button. Right now it looks like an Inny as the Kansas City Chiefs are this weeks Birth Canal Team of the week.
Final score was Oakland 23 Kansas City 8. Would some please get Al Davis a robe?

Up next we will stay on the Bottom and just stroll to the other side of Misery, to St Louis. The World Champion New York Football Giants came to St Louis, played, and won. It was not even as close as the score indicated, and they won by 28. Ellie completed 5 passes per quarter for 260 yards. Pretty good. This game had all the interest of watching grass grow on an indoor field. We can only think of one word to describe this game.
Final Score was WCNYFG 41 the Ewes 13. Not going to call you the Rams until you play like it.

Well we might as well stay on the bottom has we head to Cincinnati. Home of the Bengals and all things crappy. The Titans blew in ready to play. And we mean blew as in Hurricane Ike. The Hurricane came and slapped the Bengals like “Ike did to Tina Tuner”. Vince Young had a great game for the Titans as his stats were huh… Huh now where were those stats? Okay here they are, and it shows that Vince Young had no passes intercepted, that is good. And, huh, no completions, that is not good. Doesn’t look good for Vince Young, but it looks worse for Marvin Lewis. Hey much more play like this and Bengals will be looking for a Coach.
Final Score was Titans 24 the Bengals 7. The same number of completions as a dead man.

Up next we will stay on the bottom and find Atlanta. The Buccaneers had a Buccan Game against the Atlanta Falldowns. After last week Atlanta thought that they might have a chance this year, but once again reality has set in. The Buccaneers favorite Mexican Canadian Jeff Garcia didn’t play in this game but his magic was not needed. The Falldowns Quarterback found life in the NFL is not fun when you aren’t playing against Detroit. 13 for 33 with 4 sacks and 2 interceptions huh, not good.
Final score was Falldowns 9 the Buccaneers 24. Welcome to the NFL Mr. Ryan.

Now we stay close to the bottom as we head into Detroit. Last year we told you that when Detroit scores more than their opponents they win, when they don’t they lose. We feel that this might become the mantra of Detroit. Well Jon Kitna guaranteed a 10 win season good luck with all that. So far after two games the Lions only need 10 more wins to get to 10 wins. Aaron Rogers tried to exercise the ghosts of Brett Favre in Detroit let’s see how he did: 24 of 38 for 328 yards for Rogers 22 of 36 for 254 yards per game. Huh? Pretty good against Detroit we guess.
Final score was Packers 48 the Lions 25. That Packers name just makes us giggle.

The next game at the bottom of this week’s schedule is found in Seattle of all places. Imagine if you will a team that won NFC West the last several years, with a coach who announced his retirement at the end of the year, and a team that started this season off with a loss. The Shehawks started the game by scoring 14 points in 7 minutes. Then they went on the score on 16 more points the rest of the game. The 49ers scored 33 points the rest of the game including overtime. A much better showing than last week game for the 49ers..
Final score the 49ers 33 the Shehawks 30. In a word Yuck.

And now we turn our sights to the week’s crappy game on CBS. The Miami Dolphins traveled out of their home and into the dessert of Ari-Freaking-Zona. And has we all know Dolphins can’t live in a Dessert. They need… What? Yes it is. It’s a proven fact. Yes we saw it on the discovery channel show about animals living in other environments, you know like those people living in Wyoming. They have grown accustom to that environment and if any took them out of that area and moved them to some place like say Alabama, they would surely die. So if you take the Dolphins out of the water and into the desert then they will die, kind of like they did on Sunday. With the day the Cardinals had we should be able to find some great stats? Matt Leinart was 1 for 2 for 15 yards wow, isn’t that great?
Final Score Miami 10 the Cardinals 31. Thanks God no one had to watch this game.

Well we guess we should talk about the crappy game on Fox. Last year Da Bears found a way to win a game then lose a game. So this year is different right? Last week the Bears had a new Quarterback, Kyle Orton, a new running back, Matt Forte, and the same old win one lose one. So after charging out to a 17 to 3 lead Da Bears allowed Jake Delhomme to shape and mold them in to mediocre team of one win and one loss. There is only one word that we could use to describe this game…
Final score Da Bears 17 the Panthers 20. We guess next week the Bears will win.

Finally getting away from the bottom we find ourselves in Washington. The New Orleans Saints came to Washington like Mr. Smith, with bright ideas, and lots of integrity. Lets take a look at the greatest Running back in the History of the NFL Reggie had 10 carries for 28 yards with a long of 9 yards making his true stats 9 carries for 19 yards. Wow, with production like that how can the Saints lose? His Receiving stats were 7 catches for 63 yards with a long of 14 yards, making the actual stats 6 for 49 yards. Can you believe that production? 17 touches a game, huh I wonder how much of the defensive game plan there was to stop Reggie Bush? We know we know. He had a punt return for 55 yards and a touchdown, but did you see the taunting he did on the way to the end zone? The referee did and he flagged our beloved Reggie for taunting. 15 yards, so what do we take that yardage off of? Well after the extra point the S-Aints didn’t score again while the Redskins scored 14 to win the game.
Final score S-Aints 25 the Redskins 29. Hey Reggie, God doesn’t like ugly.

For some reason we find that Jacksonville is next on this stroll. So okay let us get this straight, last year the Jacksonville Jaguars were thought to have the best chance to beat the undefeated Patriots, but they didn’t and now they don’t win at all. Buffalo is not proving our theory that you can’t travel across country and win. Huh unless you are traveling to Florida. We yawned and missed most of this game. Jacksonville can’t seem to get out of their on way at the moment.
Final score Buffalo 20 Jacksonville 16. Yawn did someone say it was time for a nap?

Now is the time when we talk about the game with the Viqueens. Indy came to town looking for a win and found one. After the Viqueens ran out to a 15 point lead they decided to lay down on the field and let Peyton Manning do his magic. Tarvaris Jackson proved why he can’t play in the NFL for now, by completing 14 passes all day. We aren’t sure he even completed a pass in warm ups. If it wasn’t for Adrian Peterson the Viqueens would not have had any offense, Ryan Longwell showed us all why he didn’t take kicking lessons from Heather Mills. But if he had made a 48 yard field goal in the fourth this game might have turned out differently.
Final score The Colts 18 the Viqueens 15. Missed it by this much.

Up next we go to New England home of the Patriots. As well said earlier God don’t like ugly and God has not smiled on the Patriots. But God has really frowned on the New York Bretts. The Brett Favre lead New York team thought they had everything under control, with Tom Terrific out for the season the AFC East theirs for taking. But not too fast there Bretty boy. There is an old saying to be the man you have to beat the man and this week you didn’t beat the man, you just got beat. If you smell what Expo is cooking. What? What? Yes we are raising our eyebrow, but only above one eye.
Final score the Bretts 10 the Patriots 19. OOOOHHHHH Yea!!!!!

And finally the last game of the afternoon we head to Denver. In Denver we find a hard fought AFC West battle. Denver did everything it could to get to a 31 to 17 point lead at halftime, but then decided to take the second half off as the Chargers roared back to a lead 38 to 31. Then Ed Hockuli could not stand it any longer as he took the game into his own hands. Who is Ed Hockuli you ask? He was the head official during the game who with just moments to go decided to blow the whistle at the most inopportune time. Taking away a fumble and the ball and giving it back to Denver. And with new life Denver stuck in the end zone then without even thinking twice they went for 2. 2? Yes 2 and made it. Huh, somebody finally wanted to win a game? Too bad it was Mike Shanahan. And now the worst thing in the world has happened.
Final score was the Chargers 38 the Broncos 39. Oh no Norv Turner is 0 and 2.

Finally on Sunday we find the Sunday night game we had an AFC North Battle of familiar foes. Pittsburg and Cleveland did all they could to set football back 30 years. Good Lord we have seen better games of Bingo down at the nursing home. We mean come on, 12 of 19 for 186 yards with no interceptions is not good unless you play in New Jersey maybe? Well golden boy Derek Anderson stunk it up just as bad going 18 for 32 for 166 yards. So with a 10 point lead the Steelers packed it up and called it a night. With only the Browns on the field for most of the second half they could only manage 6 points.
Final score the Steelers 10 the Browns 6. Hey Romeo Cornell, trying mixing in a win huh?

On Monday we had what could have been the best game of the week the Cowboys showed everyone why they thought they would go to the Superbowl but not so fast, as we all know they must win a game in the playoffs before they can get to Superbowl. We have a question for you? What are Punt, TD, Fumble, Punt, and turnover on downs? Philadelphia’s second half drives. This game reminds us of the Quote from Former US Secretary of State John Mitchell “You can’t pick cherries with your back to the tree.” Not sure why we remembered that but we did. So Tony was a little Romo-Riffic this week as he was 21 of 30 for 312 yards. Not bad and T.O. found the end zone for the 132nd time that makes him second on the all time list of Touchdowns receptions.
Final Score the Eagle 37 the Cowboys 41. We got our popcorn ready with lots of butter.

Well that is it, hopefully you have enjoyed this as much as we have putting it together. This week we are one game short as Hurricane Ike ruined Houston’s game with Baltimore. That will be rescheduled later. So until next week…
Remember like we always say….


I was coming to the end of a long, long walk
When a man crawled out of a cardboard box
Under the E. Street Bridge
Followed me on to it
I went out halfway across
With that homeless shadow tagging along
So I dug for some change
Wouldn't need it anyway
He took it lookin' just a bit ashamed
He said, "You know, I haven't always been this way"

I've had my moments, days in the sun
Moments I was second to none
Moments when I knew I did what I thought I couldn't do
Like that plane ride coming home from the war
That summer my son was born
And memories like a coat so warm
A cold wind can't get through
Lookin' at me now you might not know it
But I've had my moments

I stood there tryin' to find my nerve
Wondering if a single soul on Earth
Would care at all
Miss me when I'm gone
That old man just kept hanging around
Lookin' at me, lookin' down
I think he recognized
That look in my eyes
Standing with him there I felt ashamed
I said, You know, I haven't always been this way

I've had my moments, days in the sun
Moments I was second to none
Moments when I knew I did what I thought I couldn't do
Like the day I walked away from the wine
For a woman who became my wife
And a love that, when it was right,
Could always see me through
Lookin' at me now you might not know it
But I've had my moments

I know somewhere 'round a trashcan fire tonight
That old man tells his story one more time
He saysI've had my moments, days in the sun
Moments I was second to none
Moments when I knew I did what I thought I couldn't do
Like that cool night on the E. Street Bridge
When a young man almost ended it
I was right there, wasn't scared a bit
And I helped to pull him through

Lookin' at me now you might not know it
Oh, lookin' at me now you might not know it
But I've had my moments

I've had my moments
I've had my moments